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#27979 - 08/12/04 06:51 AM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
playsteinway Offline
Resident Member

Registered: 07/26/04
Posts: 232
Loc: Mason, Michigan
both ideas I had'nt thought of but both worth considering further.
thanks.Im open to any input on this one I can get. I have decided to drop her but just am not sure how without shoving her over the edge with attitude and anger since she seems to be so tetchy about everything anyway.

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#27980 - 08/12/04 08:59 AM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
Lilla Offline
Star Member

Registered: 10/30/00
Posts: 1573
Loc: Chicago
Dilemma? No. Quite simple. Say good-bye with minimum explanation. "Effective [date] I will no longer be able to provide piano lessons due to scheduling conflicts. Enclosed please find a review of your musical progress while studying in my studio. I wish you best of luck in your future musical endeavors."

Period. No explanations necessary. Scheduling conflicts can mean anything and no one has a right to demand more detail. The more explanations offered, the more fuel for arguments. Simple. Concise. To the point. Period. You could add a few softer words, but that's it.

I originally thought to mention my "contract" with students - but in this case it's hopeless. FYI, each of my students signs a 1 pg. contract that says things such as "no swearing", "no whining", "no banging on piano", etc.

While thinking of policies/contracts, I had a student pull two keytops off this week - idly fidgeting - not my piano thank goodness. But, it reminded me that I don't have a damages clause in my policy. How did I overlook that? Insurance would cover "vomiting" issues - LOL - But, minor damages? Gotta be paid for by parents. Thankfully, I'm just getting ready to re-issue my policy for the annual re-signing.

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#27981 - 08/12/04 10:24 AM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
arsnova02 Offline
Mainstay Member

Registered: 07/29/01
Posts: 908
Loc: St. Louis, MO
 Quote:
Originally posted by playsteinway:
Dear ********,
While I have enjoyed teaching piano and working with you these past months I feel I am no longer an effectice teacher for you due to both age and personality differences. As I can no longer effectively teach you within a positive setting I feel at this point another instructor or facility may be better able to service your needs.
Enclosed is a copy of your student records for your next instructor. I wish you wellin your endeavors musically.
Best of Luck,
Kelly Penn


Is it un-PC to cite age differences as a problem?

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#27982 - 08/12/04 10:27 AM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
playsteinway Offline
Resident Member

Registered: 07/26/04
Posts: 232
Loc: Mason, Michigan
I think this is what I am going to do as your right, I don't want to add fuel to a fire that is all ready getting out of control with the attitude and anger. Since my husband goes to his Detroit office on Tues, Wend. Thurs. quite early in the morning and its 90 minutes away from our house I am not sure if I should mail this or deliver it to her at the door since Im not sure how she is going to react and I don't want any unpleasant scenes with students leaving as she is coming in the door.

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#27983 - 08/12/04 11:22 AM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
playsteinway Offline
Resident Member

Registered: 07/26/04
Posts: 232
Loc: Mason, Michigan
As I replied to some of this earlier Im not worried about PC correctness. Its just out of control anymore with PC everything we say.
If anyone can be accused of not being PC in this situation its the student with her less than appropriate language (GD you idiot and others). That is offensive to me because of my beliefs and standpoint.
This isn't about who is PC or not anyway, its about someone being irrational and behaving in a way that is not emotionally or mentally stable in appearance and my saftey as the teacher (as well as student safety with those before and after her lesson).

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#27984 - 08/12/04 11:26 AM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
Emilymae Offline
Resident Member

Registered: 01/19/04
Posts: 191
You are receiving great advice. I like Lilla's, there's no explanation really needed. Just like students can terminate lessons, so can teachers. If your husband cannot be home please schedule a time when someone else can be there. Even a neighbor. It will hopefully stop her from making a scene. Once she gets home she'll hopefully cool off.

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#27985 - 08/12/04 12:45 PM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
pianoc Offline
Star Member

Registered: 08/14/03
Posts: 1088
Loc: Goshen, Indiana
I like that idea - surely there is someone that would just love to have a cup of tea, or coffee, or whatever.

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#27986 - 08/12/04 01:10 PM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
playsteinway Offline
Resident Member

Registered: 07/26/04
Posts: 232
Loc: Mason, Michigan
Hello..
Well, I did it. I dropped her. The old bouce-a-roo. Hit the road Jack (or in this case Jane). Its not my way so here is your highway. Make like a banana and split.
(can you tell Im completely relieved now :0)

I put all her records into a folder and attached a letter that I rewrote into four sentences or so reading this way:

Dear ______,
I feel that at this time I will no longer be able to continue lessons with you due to the conflicts at lessons around the current schedule. I simply feel that at this time you should explore your options elsewhere. Enclosed you will find a review of your musical progression with your study thus far. I wish you luck in your musical endeavors.
____________

I made it effective immediately.

I figure I will know the reaction if she emails or calls my house ranting and raving but that is what I have a hubby for - to feild irate phone calls like Im sure this may be.

I will keep everyone posted about anything that happens. The post office said it would get there tomorrow. Brace ourselves shall we.. arrrrgh. I feel relieved though and no more stress over the saftey and well being of myself and my students.

Thanks for the help.... and like I said, I will let you know what the fall out of this is (if any).

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#27987 - 08/13/04 02:45 PM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
Christine/Pelirroja Offline
Resident Member

Registered: 08/23/03
Posts: 245
Loc: CA, USA
You did the right thing! Yay for you. Now, my curiosity is getting the best of me. What in the world is the problem with being scheduled after someone? Did she give you a reason (not that that would excuse any behavior)? I'm just sitting here totally baffled.

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#27988 - 08/13/04 03:08 PM Re: Adult Student Dilemna- HELP!
Lisa Kalmar Offline
Star Member

Registered: 04/10/00
Posts: 4277
Loc: KC
oooh, both Lilla's idea and the letter you ended up with are brilliant! Why didn't I think of that?!? Congratulations on having the guts to end this before it really got ugly.

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